Dead Presidents

Yes, I am very, very single.

As for your second question, I believe the old saying is that “gentlemen prefer blondes”, correct?

Well, I am not now, nor have I ever been, much of a “gentleman”, I guess.  You see, I open doors, pay for dinner, walk closer to the street than my companion, listen, smile, and say “please” and “thank you”.  But I’ve never been in a relationship and can’t even recall my last date with a blonde girl.  I have a brunette addiction.  The girls that I’m attracted to can usually be found in the lyrics to LL Cool J songs — give me an Around The Way Girl with a Boomin’ System, and I’m all good.

(Especially those girls who walk with a switch and talk with street slang.  She doesn’t need the bamboo earrings, Fendi bag, or bad attitude, but the lollipop at the bus stop works wonders.  This is still a Presidential history blog, right?)